Tuesday, August 26, 2014

New McCalls Patterns: Fall 2014

AKA when women are encouraged by the powers that be to embrace their inner catholic school girl. Hit me baby one more time...

McCalls 7022

I like how they choose the longest skirt to showcase here, trying to minimize the Britney comparisons. I see right through you McCalls!!! Its Britney, bitch.

McCalls 7014
Its nice when a school offers you more than one uniform option. The school of McCalls. Want to hear a funny (sad) story? My middle school required uniforms in the form of shirts. While my mom and I were waiting to buy my clothes for the next two years, the oh so well organized school ran out of all shirts, but white, X-large, short sleeve. So my uniform for a few months of middle school hell were two X-large white shirts, one with a huge margarine stain on the front. When black, medium shirts were finally offered again it was a revelation. I wonder why I wasn't cool...

McCalls 7025
Designer Joi! I can't not say this without using jazz hands. Designer Joi! Those fabrics (together, apart?) are hideous. Its already a coat with a lot of stuff, it didn't need 1980's fabrics too.

McCalls 7017
Designer Joi! The ruffle on that shirt is ugly and the bellybutton slit in the shirt is making me twitch. Designer Joi doens't have a singular POV, does she? Those are two very different patterns.

McCalls 7016
Giant shawl collars look so dated, not my style.

McCalls 7021
Hey, that's cute! The beads certainly make it, but its a good base! The peplum isn't too puffy, this is great!

It even comes with a mullet peplum, that's fine. That's all, right?
Oh no, they added another peplum layer, not a great decision. That is the end right? Right?!?!

Oh dear god the peplums are taking over....
Really why stop here McCalls. Why not 4,5,6? Can't look much uglier than this and the peplum pieces are likely just rectangles.

McCalls 7018
The collar's kind of sad-droopy, but I'd wear this. I like ruched sleeves and tabs as long as the buttons are functional so I can iron the creases out. Wait, the sleeve is gathered in the tab in this picture and not in the line drawing. I hate when the actual garment in the envelope isn't what is on the envelope. Anyone else run into this? Simplicity seems to be the biggest violator of my trust.

McCalls 7026
This is an exercise outfit, I get that. Is that thing on the back supposed to be wings and a homage to Hermes? Running fast and stuff. Because that would be kind of cute. If not, what were they thinking? Also, lace butt ruffle, no. Just no.

My favorite pattern in this run is McCalls 7019. When I first saw it in the thumbnail, well, see for youself.

Oh that's cute, McCalls is making skating costumes.

Oh dear, those are pants.

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